Journey

It was a dark and stormy night... Actually, I was sitting on the couch next to my husband staring at a therapist on the computer screen... The other day I was listening to a training video designed for therapists who work with individuals with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. There were several speakers including Dr. Bessel van der Kolk (a researcher and expert on trauma and its effects on the limbic system and body), Dr. Pat Ogden (a pioneer in somatic psychology for those with PTSD), Peter Levine (trauma Psychologist and developer of somatic experiencing), Dr. Ruth Lanius (director of the PTSD research center in Ontario, Canada), Dr. Dan Siegel (expert on interpersonal relationships and their effects on the brain, UCLA co-director of the Mindful Awareness Research Center), and Dr. Stephen Porges (Behavioral Neuroscientist and author of The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-Regulation ). I was particularly interested in th

I took Paxil for six months starting in June 2005. I began tapering off of it the beginning of December that same year, and by January 2006, I was medication free. It was a difficult month of tapering. I was nauseous, dizzy, had headaches, and experienced what many call "zaps." It was as though my brain was getting shocked multiple times a day. It was relatively painless but annoying because I could not focus on anything, and if I moved my head or eyes too quickly, it was as though I was being punished for it. I also remember very vividly sitting in my bedroom with my heart racing, maybe hallucinating, considering suicide because the thoughts were so powerful, and wondering when the worst would be over. Paxil had only been in my life for six months. Many people who take anti-depressants, especially SSRI's (Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors) are on them for five years, or even ten before they can stop treatment or need a change in medications. It makes sense that tho